When Your World Falls Apart, You'll Still Have Me
by SamanthaR3n33
Summary: SwanQueen. What happens when Regina and Emma share an unexpected kiss. But misunderstandings and hurt feelings lead to Emma running back to Boston, looking for comfort from an old friends and some distance from Storybrooke. There will be angst, but I do love my fluff, so if that's not your thing you probably shouldn't read this. Rated M for later chapters and language.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N This is set roughly a year after Snow kills Cora. All of season 3 never happened in this fic., Henry never got kidnaped and no one ever went to Neverland. So the curse hasn't fully been broken yet and everyone is more or less living happily in Storybrooke. **

**As I said in my description, this is my first attempt at writing Fan Fic, so I would love reviews and feedback! **

**The ****SQ****'s represent a change in perspective and the Italics are characters thoughts.**

**Enjoy! (Hopefully lol)**

Standing in the middle of the annual Fourth of July fair, surrounded by children laughing, the smell of corn dogs and roasted peanuts, the sound of carnival rides surrounding her, it hits her like a bus, so fast that she is forced to sit down, else she might fall to her knees in front everyone passing by.

At once, it all clicks into place within her head. She has feelings for Regina. The mayor of this little town in Maine. The mother of her son.

She can no longer deny it. At least not to herself. How had she not seen it before? All of the signs had been there. How had she let herself get so captured within the whirlwind that was Regina?

After going through a shit load of crazy over the past year, including becoming sheriff, having epic showdowns with said mayor, breaking the "curse" (Please! These people were lucky to be taken out of that god-forsaken place) and taking an unexpected (and unwelcome) trip to fairy tale land with her best friend turned mother, things had finally started to settle down.

Her and Regina had even started getting along…for the most part...you know, when they weren't fighting about visitation hours or paperwork that Emma hadn't completed or Henry's diet or…well…basically any other nonsense that they found fit to disagree on. But the "fights" had turned into a playful bantering, more like that of a married couple than actual fighting. And she had found herself looking forward to their little quarrels every morning, until they had eventually became the highlight of her day.

Everything had started to change after Regina had saved her and Mary Margaret…Snow… Mom?...whatever... from that well, by ingesting a death spell that had nearly killed her.

Emma might even stretch to call them friends. Although she would never agree to that if asked directly, mainly because either her mother or the infamous mayor herself would practically kill her, albeit for different reasons, should she ever say anything like that in public.

Regina wouldn't particularly…appreciate… how weak it would make her appear if she was known to be "friends" with her arch nemesis' daughter.

Whereas her mother just plain hated Regina and would never approve of her daughter "fraternizing" with the brunette in any way that didn't involve either Henry or work.

Hahahaha! If only her mother truly knew how she felt about the difficult and bull-headed, yet incredibly beautiful mayor. Snow would literally shit bricks, and then proceed to bash Emma in the head with them in order to try and "make her see reason", if she were to ever find out about Emma's little predicament.

Which is exactly why she is never going to find out! Besides…she would get over it eventually…or not…you know, whatever! She would cross that bridge when it came. Besides, _I've always had had a knack for getting into trouble throughout the years_, she thought to herself with a smirk.

A particularly obnoxious laugh brings her back to the current moment as a couple walks by. She glances at them, somewhat annoyed for being taken out of her inner musings, before her eyes automatically search out and lock onto the mayor.

The brunette is sitting alone on one of the park benches across the fair grounds from Emma, picking at her nails as she waits for Henry to get off of one of the dizzying fair rides that he is currently on with his best friend, Melody.

It appears as though Regina is serving as chaperone for the two kids tonight, and to be honest, she looks utterly bored to death. Which shouldn't really be a surprise considering Regina isn't exactly the "fair going" type, but as she's said before, she would do anything for her son. Even if it meant sacrificing a Friday night for his enjoyment.

So Emma makes the decision to go see if she can succeed in cheering up the brunette. She grabs a funnel cake from the nearest food vender and strolls up to the unsuspecting mayor.

******SQ******

Emma plops down next to her on the bench, and asks "Funnel Cake?" as she stuffs a piece of the sugarcoated cake into her own mouth while she reaches the plate toward the brunette.

The mayor glances over at Emma with an unimpressed look, only to see that the blonde has already managed to cover herself with the powdery substance.

She tries to suppress a smile by pursing her lips, "Miss Swan." She says in greeting before she continues on, "Devouring the nauseating junk they call food here, I see. Why am I not surprised?" she barely manages to say in an indifferent tone, with one of her iconic eyebrows raised.

"Well that's obviously because you know me too well Madam Mayor!" Emma says with a flirtatious wink and a bright smile that manages to take the brunette completely by surprise while simultaneously stealing the breath from her lungs. Only Emma could manage to look so… delicious… while covered in powdered sugar.

_Wait…what? Where on earth had THAT come from?!_ The mayor thinks to herself as she looks away from the blonde, trying to regain control of her rampant thoughts.

She manages to pull herself out of her thoughts enough to respond, "I highly doubt that Miss Swan. You've always been rather predictable, dear." but it lacked her usual flare, as she is still trying to understand why her brain had inserted "delicious" as a plausible description for the blonde.

"Oh, I'm predictable am I?" The blonde sheriff mutters as she glances over at Henry, who is now heading towards the ginormous ferris wheel in the middle of the fair with Melody.

"Yes dear. Very…" But that's all that the mayor manages to say before Emma grabs her wrist and drags her off of the bench and in the direction of their son. They manage to reach the ride while it's still loading, although they gain a few funny looks in the process, what with the town's sheriff dragging the mayor halfway across the fair, but neither truly cares.

When the brunette discovers the blondes intention she yells, "No! Absolutely not, Miss Swan! You cannot be serious!"

"I am not getting on…that." She continues with a sneer thrown towards the rusty ride. But Emma ignores her and resumes dragging her into line for the horrendous ride.

She manages to yank her wrist from the sheriff's grasp and crosses her arms across her chest in protest, refusing to move.

"Yes I am, and yes, you will!" The blonde says back, moving with the line as more and more passengers load onto the two person benches and she pushes the brunette as she goes.

"Oh really! And why exactly do you believe that Dear?" She exclaims as she glares at the blonde for pushing her towards the shortening gap between themselves and the gate.

"Because your son would enjoy it if you to ride it. Isn't that right Henry?" Emma says louder than before, directing her voice toward the front of the line.

Regina then see's her son's head peek back from a few spots in front of them as he answers "Yea! Come on mom, you love the ferris wheel! We used to ride it together every year! So stop having a temper tantrum and just ride it with Emma!"

Accepting her defeat, the brunette huffs out a lung full of air and shoots a glare at the blonde as she grumbles "Alright Miss Swan. I will ride the damn ride with you."

Upon hearing these words, the blonde gives her another breathtaking smile, which does exactly that, steals the breath right from the mayor's lungs, leaving her breathless for the second time in the past 10 minutes.

The only difference being that this time, Emma catches the effect she has on the mayor before she had managed to cover it up. And an almost predatory glint appeared in the blondes' eyes.

She looks away and sends a text to Marco, who was currently operating the controls of the ride, to ask for a favor, leaving the mayor to her own thoughts.

_What the hell is wrong with you tonight?! This is ridiculous! Stop acting like a damn teenager Regina! You're getting all gooey over Miss Swan for gods sakes! _The mayor reprimands herself as they move into their designated seat and the ride begins.

Emma asking her a question is what finally pulls her out of her mental scolding. "I'm sorry Miss Swan, what were you saying?" She asks the blonde.

"I was just wondering whether or not you think Henry is going to make a move on Melody tonight. It's pretty obvious that her likes her, don't you think?" She asks as she casually leans back and places her arms across the back of the bench.

Regina chances a glance at Emma's arm, which is currently resting behind her back, but she doesn't say anything about it and just lets it be. She hides a pleased smile behind a cough until she manages to slip her mask of indifference back into place. "He's eleven Miss Swan! I highly doubt that he see's Miss La Mer as anything more than a friend."

Emma just smirks in response and tilts her head in the direction of the kids' bench, "Then Madam Mayor, why is it do you think, that he is currently holding her hand?"

Her head snaps toward Henry inside his own seat and her gaze zero's in on his and Melody's linked hands. "Well, it would appear that I was mistaken, and you were correct Miss Swan."

Emma chuckles softly before she says "It was bound to happen eventually Regina, even you can't know everything."

The brunette looks back up at Emma and her heart flutters at the warmth she see's in the blondes eyes. She clears her throat before she says, "Yes, I suppose so." and gives the sheriff an unusual look before glancing off toward the sun setting in the horizon.

The ride stops moving and they find themselves sitting at the top of the ferris wheel, surrounded by the glow of the setting sun and one of the most amazing views of Storybrooke that either had ever seen.

"This truly is an incredible view" Regina says as she stares out at her precious town and the surrounding woods, a genuine smile forming on her lips

"Yea…Beautiful" Emma murmurs as she stares at the brunette, who is currently surrounded by an ethereal halo of light from the setting sun, looking completely stunning and capturing the blondes gaze.

Something in the blonde's voice causes the mayor to turn her head and look at the women next to her. But they're closer than she had expected, and when she turns, they are soon deep within each other's personal space and the mayor once again gets captivated within the piercing gaze of the blonde.

"Thank you for this Miss Swan. It was very…kind of you to ask Marco to stop us when we reached the top." Upon Emma's look of bewilderment, she chuckles and says "You're not very good at being sneaky Dear, you left your phone in complete view of my gaze as you texted him."

"But seriously, no one has ever done anything like this for me before." Regina manages to say as she looks confusedly up at Emma wondering why the sheriff would do something like this.

"First off, it's Emma. And Second, it's really no big deal" she says with an easy smile, "I just figured that you could use a few minutes to relax and enjoy the view of this incredible town that you created. Besides, I really like it when I can make you smile like that."

"Thank you… Emma" She says as the smile on her face grows even larger with the blondes comment.

The breath then catches in her throat as the blonde gives her another radiant smile as she hears her name come from the mayor's lips.

But the smile soon fades as it is replaced by a sexy smirk as an intense heat fires up within the blondes eyes.

She watches as time seems to slow down and the sounds of the fair fade as Emma slowly leans in closer to her, giving the mayor enough time to stop her should she want to.

But in this moment, all of her reasoning seems to disappear as she can't, for the life of her, come up with a reason not to kiss the blonde. So she just lets it happen as she licks her lips and shuts her eyes before closing the remaining space between them and weaving her fingers within blonde curls.

As their lips tentatively brush against one another, fireworks explode behind the brunette's eyes. But at that moment, the ferris wheel unexpectedly pitches forward once again.

The moment breaks and sound pierces back into the intimate bubble they had been surrounded in as they both snap back to reality, breaking apart.

As they separate, Regina reaches her hand up to run her fingertips along her lips where they were still tingleing from making contact with Emma's.

_Well…that was surprisingly…Perfect. There really isn't any other word to describe it. _She thinks breathlessly.

As she drops her hand back onto her lap, she hears Emma give a throaty chuckle and say "So… Do you still think I'm predicable?"

She can't think of anything reasonable to say because her motor functions are still recovering from when they short-circuiting during their kiss, so she just sits back against the side of the bench and shakes her head in the negative before getting lost in her thoughts.

As they make an agonizingly slow decent toward exiting the ride, she starts to have a mental break down.

_I need to get off of this ride. Get away from her. I don't know what to do! I have to figure all of this out before I can talk to her. I can't think clearly when she's looking at me with those eyes. Especially not now! Shit! Can't this thing move any faster!_

When it's their turn to unload, the mayor flies out of the seat like her life depends on it before she spots Henry and rushes up to him.

"Henry, I've unfortunately come down with the start of a migraine, so Miss Swan has volunteered to take you two kids home when you've finished enjoying the fair. You can stay with her tonight since it's her day tomorrow, is that alright?" She says as she leans down to kiss his forehead before remembering that his…Girlfriend? _Ugh! I'll cross that bridge when it comes_... isstanding next to him and he probably wouldn't want her to kiss him in front of her.

So she settles on just smoothing out his hair as she says "I'll see you for lunch on Sunday, I love you."

Being his usually oblivious self, Henry accepts his mom's words as the truth, "Yea! It's cool! I hope you feel better! I know how bad your migraines can get. Thanks for bringing us tonight, I'll see you on Sunday!" he says before pulling Melody off in the direction of another ride. "Love you too!" he throws over his shoulder at the last minute.

A pang of hurt stabs through her heart as she thinks back to a time when she had been Henry's whole world and he had loved her completely.

"Where's the kid going?" The sheriff's voice startles her from her inner thoughts and she turns around to face the blonde.

She clears her throat and tentatively meets the sheriff's eyes, "He's off to enjoy the rest of his evening with Miss La Mer before you take him home. Now, if you'll please excuse me, I need to leave." She says in an icier tone than intended, before disappearing into the crowd. She glances over her shoulder one last time and she see's the confused and hurt look on Emma's face.

_Shit…What was that Regina! Why did you have to say it like that?! *Sigh* Well, it's too late to fix it now. Damn it! She probably thinks she "fucked up". I just can't think when she looks at me like that! I had to get away or else I might have broken down in front of the whole fair, which is unacceptable! But I'm not sure that an escape was worth hurting her for…_

She's so lost in her thoughts that she doesn't even realize that she didn't walk to her mansion, but to the beach instead. So when she ends up in front of one of the benches in the sand, she's completely surprised and confused as to how she ended up there.

But deciding not to dwell too much over it at the moment, she sits down on the bench and rests her head in her hands while closing her eyes and listening to the waves crashing gently on the shore.

As soon as she shuts her eyes, a cascade of thoughts start to bounce around within her head, before they eventually taking on two forms; that of the new, reformed Regina and that of The Evil Queen…

_What the hell just happened?_

**_Miss Swan just kissed you, that's what! _**

_Yes I know! It was a rhetorical question….Since when does she even like women? _

**_Why does that even matter? It doesn't change the fact that she still kissed you! And you enjoyed it!_**

_...Shit. This can't really be happening. _

**_Well it did! And you need to put a stop to it before it goes any further!_**

_I actually, sort of, want it to happen again. That was an incredible kiss...wow…and our lips only barely brushed. What if it had become more heated. I can't even imagine what that would feel like. But I think I want to find out._

**_Stop thinking like that! This is Miss Swan for gods sakes! Snow. Fucking. White's. Daughter! This is completely unacceptable. You hate her whole family, especially her! Remember?!_**

…_.Hate is a very strong word. We've_****_even been getting along pretty well lately. And they aren't really her family, she only just found them, and she's having a hard time adjusting to it. Besides, the family doesn't make the person._

**_She tried to steal Henry!_**

_No she didn't. Not really. She only wanted to get to know him._

**_She's a charming!_**

_Yes, and she definitely lives up to the name. She undoubtedly has a certain charm about her. _

**_What?! Stop thinking like that! Are you insane! _**

_I must be. Because I don't think I can stop this. She's beautiful, I've always noticed that, and she obviously likes me. So where's the harm in seeing where this could go? What if she's my true love! That would be just the thing the ironic bitch fate would throw at us._

**_Regina! This is Miss Swan we're thinking about! There's harm everywhere! It's never going to work out! She's only trying to get close to you so she can have the upper hand! She just wants to seduce you so she can break your heart later. And we vowed to NEVER again let that happen! Love is weakness! Remember!_**

_No. She isn't the type of person to do that. Besides, she's already had so many chances to hurt me and she only ever saves or defends me. _

_The emotions that I saw in her eyes tonight while we were on top of that ferris wheel, they were real. And she had Marco stop the ferris wheel just so she could see me smile. _

_No, this isn't an act. All of it was real. And I probably just ruined everything by running from her. That's all that everyone's ever done, left her unwanted. No! I have to go fix this, try to explain!_

She lifts her heads out of her hands as her internal argument comes to a close.

And with that last thought, she gets up from the bench and heads back into the direction of the fair lights to find Emma and tell her how she truly feels.

**For anyone who's interested, Melody's last name, La Mer, is French for the Sea, which I thought fit her pretty well considering she's Ariel's and Prince Eric's daughter. **

**So that's it! What did you think? Does anyone want to see it continue? Any feedback, good or bad, is appreciated! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N Did anyone else think that that episode last night was super intense! I won't say anything because I don't want to ruin it for anyone who hasn't seen it yet, but…wow lol**

**So anyways, I hadn't originally planned to update so soon but it was super nice out today (was in the 50's when its been in single digits) so I sat outside and just knocked out this chapter because I could and because I have no life :p lol It's a little short, but I'm getting it to you really early so I hope that makes up for it a bit!**

**-Sam 3**

As she watches the brunette disappear into the crowd, she can feel her heart plummet into her stomach, full of dread and regret with what she had just done.

Obviously not thinking clearly and not remembering how the Mayor had first reacted to the kiss before her walls had shot up and her mask slipped back into place, she only focused on the rejection that was currently bombarding her, and

she started to freak out and beat herself up.

_What the hell was that Swan! Why did I have to initiate that damn kiss?! _

_Yea, sure, the brunette had closed that last little inch between us and connected our lips, but I can't really blame her for that. I know how easy it is to get caught up in the moment. Hell, I'm the perfect example of that, just look at Henry!_

_Damn it Emma! You really couldn't control yourself for five fucking minutes! I was only supposed to make her smile, not fucking kiss her and give my feelings away!_

_She probably isn't even into girls! That's probably why she practically ran from me, she was disgusted!_

_Of course she isn't interested in me! She's Regina. Fucking. Mills. for gods sake! _

_She's the absolute definition of perfection! And I'm just broken. There's no way that she could ever possibly want me. Besides, she deserves so much better._

_What was I even thinking?! That she would just jump into a relationship with me and I could finally be a part of an actual family with her and Henry, and then we would all live happily ever after?! _

_Ha! Yea right! Of course that wasn't going to happen! No one ever wants me!_

_Hell! Even my own parents want to have another kid to replace me. _She thinks to herself as she flashes back to a few weeks prior when Snow had mentioned that her and Charming were going to start trying to "expand the family". She had been forced to sit there and act all excited when in reality it had absolutely devastated her inside.

_The only person who has ever chosen me by his or her own accord is Henry. And he only come and found me when he discovered that his adoptive mother was The Evil Queen and I was "The Savior". _

_Before he knew about the curse, he had been perfectly happy without me in his life. Just like everyone else._

_Hell! Maybe it would be best for everyone if I just disappeared for a while. Besides I'm never going to be able to even talk to Regina ever again, or, at least, not for a very, very long time. _

_Yea, disappearing sounds pretty good right now._

As she comes to this conclusion, a new wave of regret hits her hard and she has to fight to not break down out in the open where everyone can see her.

She takes a deep breath before searching the crowd for two of the individuals responsible for her current break down, her parents.

She spots both of them standing next to Granny's beer booth, talking to Ruby and Belle.

Not trusting her current emotions, she makes the decision to call them, instead of risking a face-to-face interaction where she might break down.

Reaching into her pocket, she pulls out her cell phone and dials her mother's number.

The brunette picks up on the third ring with a _"Hey Sweetie!"_

"Hey. Can you do me a favor and keep Henry for the rest of the weekend? Something came up and I have to go to Boston for a while."

"_Yea, of course! Is everything alright?"_ Snow asks as her.

"Yea. Cassie just texted me and asked me to visit her and I know she wouldn't have asked if it wasn't important, so I'm going to drive out tonight. I just need a place for Henry to stay until he goes to Regina's on Sunday."

If her mother noticed the way her voice had caught slightly on the mayor's name, she didn't say anything. Instead focusing on her daughter mentioning one of her old foster siblings.

Emma had told Snow about Cassie, one of her foster sisters, and the only person that Emma had ever truly cared about, when she had only been Mary Margaret, and she sincerely regrets it. Now every time Emma mentions Cassie in front of the brunette, she gets unusually quite and teary eyed and looks like a kicked puppy.

But at this moment, she couldn't care less if her "mother's" feeling were hurt, she just wanted to get out of this town that seemed to be closing in around her with every minute she stayed.

"_Oh…okay…well… I hope that everything's okay. Call us when you get there so we know you made it safe."_ Her mother practically whispers in response.

"Thanks, will do!" She says before hanging up and walking in the direction of her apartment.

She scrolls through her contacts list until she comes across the number that she's looking for and opens up a new text message.

**Hey Cassie! Do you mind if I crash with you for a while? I'm coming to Boston. I miss you!**

She only had to wait for about half a minute before her phone lit up with a new message.

_**Why are you even asking! Of course you can stay with me Sissy! When are you thinking about?**_

Emma smiles softly as she reads Cassie's nickname for her, before responding.

**How's tonight?**

The next messages come almost instantaneously.

_**Tonight?!**_

_**What's wrong?! Are you okay?! **_

She could practically feel the anxiety rolling off of the message and her heart flutters at her sister's rising anxiety level and how worried she was for her. It was comforting and something completely familiar between them. They had always protected and taken care of each other throughout the years

**Yea, I'm okay, just a lot of stuff going on, I need a bit of an escape. I have a lot to fill you in on. So I figured why not start tonight! **

_**Hahaha okay! As long as you're not pregnant again, I think we'll be able to work through it! :p**_

…**.That was low, even for you! Lol**

**I'll see you in like 4 hours!**

_**Hahahaha I'm sorry, I couldn't resist! **_

_**See you soon! Drive Safe!**_

She smiled faintly at her phone. God she'd missed Callie! Only 4 hours until she can could see her! They should fly by pretty fast. She hoped.

She exits out of their conversation and finds the one that she already has open with Henry.

**- Hey Kid, your grandparents want to spend the weekend with you, so they're going to take you home tonight and keep you until you go to your mom's on Sunday. So be good! Okay? I'll see you soon! Love you!**

When she finishes typing out the message, she puts her phone on silent and sticks it in her pocket as she finally reaches her apartment. She unlocks the door and heads into her bedroom.

She pulls out a duffel bag from the closet and places it on her bed to begin packing. She throws in a few pairs of jeans and most of her shirts, because she's not sure how long she'll be staying. She packs an extra pair of boots along with her underwear and toiletries, before heading into the living room to grab her laptop and phone charger.

After she finishes packing, she picks up her red leather jacket and checks her hip for her badge and gun, before she picks up her bag and leaves, locking the door on her way out.

As she gets into her Bug, she throws her bag in the back seat and puts Cassie's address into her GPS. When everything is ready to go, she pulls off down the street, away from her and Henry's shared apartment, and starts to take the circuitous route out of Storybrooke since the fair is currently occupying all of Main Street.

Thinking about the fair drags up all of the memories of the last few hours along with a new wave of sorrow and regret.

Her eyes start to water again as she thinks about how stupid she is. With no excuse to stop them, she finally lets her tears fall as she drives past the "leaving Storybrooke" sign and starts her long and torturous drive to Boston.

**A/N Soo…What do you all think? Is Emma overreacting? Or is she right to freak out and run to Boston? I would love to hear what you all think!**

**P.S. I think that I have a pretty good idea about where I want to take this storyline and it could or could not be turning into a crossover in coming chapters. I'd love to let you know what I'm thinking, but I don't want to ruin the surprise should I decide to go down that particular path! :D**


End file.
